Eloise (& Brad) online

Last week I upgraded this website to Wordpress 2.6 using the automatic upgrade plugin. Although most of you won’t notice any changes, it will allow me to add some new features soon.

For those of you that didn’t notice I have recently added a ratings bar on most of the jokes and posts. This will allow me to see which entries are the most popular on the site. So please cast your vote.

I also fixed the contact us page, which had stopped working (not sure when).

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I didn’t get any decent jokes in my inbox last week, so no joke this week.

If you got any good jokes last week (that are clean!) please either post one in the comments below, or use the contact us page above.

Thanks

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A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks for their orders. The man says, ‘A Hamburger, fries and a coke,’ and turns to the ostrich, ‘What’s yours?’
‘I’ll have the same,’ says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order. ‘That will be $9.40 please,’ she says and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact amount for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, ‘A hamburger, fries, and a coke.’
The ostrich says, ‘I’ll have the same.’
Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact amount.

For a while this becomes routine until the two enter again later in the week.

‘The usual?’ asks the waitress.
‘No, this time it’s a treat, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad,’ says the man.
‘Yep! Same,’ says the ostrich.
Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, ‘That will be $32.62.’
Once again the man pulls the exact amount out of his pocket and places it on the table.

The waitress can’t hold back her curiosity any longer.
Continue Reading »

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Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy,looking like he’d just been run over by a train.
His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he’s walking with a limp
‘What happened to you?’ asks Sean, the bartender.
‘Jamie O’Conner and me had a fight,’ says Paddy.
‘That little shit, O’Conner,’ says Sean,
‘He couldn’t do that to you, he must have had something in his hand.’
‘That he did,’ says Paddy, ‘a shovel is what he had, and a terrible lickin’ he gave me with it.’
‘Well,’ says Sean, ‘you should have defended yourself, didn’t you have something in your hand?’ Continue Reading »

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This week I have been in London, so Monday night I ate in the Rhodes Brasserie Bar (Rhodes, as in Gary Rhodes) in the Hotel.

I started with breast of pigeon with tagliatelle, followed by Pork Osso Bucco, with Mash.  I would of really liked to have a desert but I was rather full after the other two courses.

There is another Rhodes restaurant at the Hotel, Rhodes w1, however the prices at the Brasserie weren’t cheap, I can’t imagine what they were like at the restaurant.

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There is now a new feature available of the website; ratings.

The stars a the bottom of every post allow you to rate the post, this will primarily be used for the jokes and food posts, but it may be included in other posts.

Just hover over the stars with your mouse, and when you are happy with how may are green, click your mouse.

The votes are totally anonymous

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